Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Maybe not the best decision

Bathroom: 1 (lots of urgency, pain in the rectum, cramps, pain upper left, yadda yadda yadda, what I did pass was fm with a little d.)

We were all a little under the weather. Lovely boy fell on his way home from school (hard to do the crutches over the curbs) and was feeling really tired and lots of pain. Pook was doing her best to try to take some burden off the rest of us but in the meantime was doing too much and feeling very unwell. I made dinner and then barely had enough left to get the kitchen cleaned and get back to bed, draw in Pook to get her talking and keep her from isolating so that I could really see how she was doing. John got home from a full day at work to find the gaggle of us just about at the ends of our ropes. Luckily, he had been home for lunch and he and I had talked, saw the writing on the wall and developed the beginnings of a plan.

While I spent quiet time with Pook, John took Lovely boy to DQ and they picked up a friend of his on the way to come back and hang out. I did eat most of a smal DQ blizzard. I have not felt great since but damn it was good and I can surely use the calories! The treat picked up everyone's spirits and Pook smiled and chatted, Lovely boy hugged us before he slept and John and smiled while he did laundry.

I have this terrible full feeling. It happens lately when I eat and it stimulates what poop there is in my colon but it can't come out. It seems to just sit along the top, stopped at the left upper corner. If it makes it past the corner, it finds a couple more obstacles that hold it back, the last nearly impenetrable one being my actual rectum. Nearly nothing gets past that strong hold. Damn inflamation.

So now I am facing another colonoscopy knowing that I am full of poop and yet they have told me only to fast for four hours. I don't think so. I am going on liquids tomorrow and I may do half of a prep. I need some movement. I can't go through this and then have poop get in the way. Maybe I would feel better if I had a little emptiness inside. I think I will call them in the morning and tell them that I really feel like I need a little emptying. Hopefully they won't mind that. It might also make me feel a little less guilty for tonights icecream cheat.

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